Email Annoyances

EMAIL ANNOYANCES (MSN.com)
· Don't thank me. If you're my boss and appreciate something I've done, that's cool. Otherwise, bag it. I hate being thanked, particularly with a "thx." And don't copy me when you thank someone else, either, unless they saved a little girl from a well or something. I'm busy dealing with the other 150 e-mails I got today.

· In fact, don't copy me on something that's just going to annoy me. If something is going wrong and you need to unload: Call me. Otherwise, you're using the electronic bypass to avoid my 18-wheeler as we trundle down the information superhighway.

· But don't forget to copy me if I should know about it. That's right. I'm inconsistent. Figure it out. Knowing when to get people involved and when to leave them out is a basic management skill.

· Don't make me think about anything for more than 15 seconds. Send me 12 long single-spaced paragraphs and I'll send you the bill for a bump up on my bifocal prescription.

· Don't expect a response to every e-mail. I don't expect you to answer me all the time, either. I put the letters NRN -- no reply necessary -- at the end of most of my e-mails. It cuts down on "Thx" and "Will do" and "No problem" replies from people who think I want them.

· E-mail is perhaps the least congenial forum for anything funny, dire, or personal. Unless you're an Oscar-winning screenwriter, play it straight. No sarcasm. No emotions. Anything really worth saying should be said on the phone. Or in person.

· If there's an article with my name in it or a picture of my dog, send it along. But sucking up with pointless "thought you might like this" e-mails is crying wolf: Next time you send one that really matters, I'll be that much more likely to ignore it.

· Go easy on the CC field, especially when you're venting or playing politics.

· Unless you're indispensable, don't get too personal. Sure, the EVP of Human Resources is e-mailing his wine broker 20 times a day, but selective enforcement of laws is what totalitarian states are all about.

· Business language is English. Weird gizmotic lingo is for MySpace or AIM. We're at the office. Write like a smart person, not a vowel-challenged moron.

· Don't be too boring, though. With close business associates, you may toss in a random "Dude," even. People like to be called dude, especially stone square pegs in Accounting and Finance. It makes them feel like hipsters.

· Don't become a zombie. It is now possible to conduct virtually your entire career like a boneless homunculus, basking in the glow of a computer screen. But come on. It's nice outside. Give it a try. Oh yeah, and ...

· Leave your BlackBerry at home when you go to the beach. And turn it off at night, too. You have other hardware that needs attention after hours, don't you, Dude?

Sean Morey joins Wayne Kelly

I laughed so hard this morning as Sean Morey debut his new song ADD on the radio my sides hurt! Meet Sean at www.seanmorey.com

Thanks for being on the show Sean!
Wayne

Jaci Rae on the Wayne and Jayne show

Jaci shares secrets to becoming a mystery shopper, getting free lunches, and paid to drive. Everyone loves it Jaci drops by the show.

To find out more about Jaci, www.shopforaday.com (and you can see some of the really big deals she has gotten and still gets today, because seeing really is believing!)

Wayne Kelly

Can you say Ouch

BIKER'S MEMBER STRUCK BY LIGHTNING: A Croatian motorbiker's penis was zapped by lightning as he stopped beside the road to urinate. Ante Djindjic said: "I don't remember what happened. One minute I was taking a leak and the next thing I knew I was in hospital. Doctors said the lightning went through my body, and because I was wearing rubber boots, it earthed itself through my penis." Djindjic, who suffered light burns to his chest and arms, added: "Thankfully, the doctors said that there would be no lasting effects, and my penis will function normally eventually."

Men and Women talk fashion

WHAT WOMEN HATE ABOUT WHAT MEN WEAR

· Socks -- These were far the most frequently mentioned item of annoyance. Socks, women say, must be long enough to cover the calf or yuck. Nothing is less titillating than a glimpse of a hairy skin below the trouser cuff when a man wearing short socks crosses his legs. Also out are socks with clogs, black socks with tennis shoes and socks with holes in them.

· Miami Beach macho -- Exposing five buttons' worth of chest and a medallion should be hung by their gold chains.

· Misfits -- Women say clothes that don't fit advertise poor character traits.

· Textures -- Passions run high. Men shouldn't wear velour, it's like being with a stuffed animal. Silk is arrogant. Corduroy, yes! Rayon, no! Camel's hair, yes! Double knit, no! Eventually one rule emerges, men shouldn't shine.

· Shoes -- This is an easy one. Whether women were partial to men in Gucci's or Adidas, glove-leather tips or crepe-sole Hush Puppies, nobody loves tassel loafers.

· Underwear -- Questions about boxers or briefs and t-shirts verses sleeve-less undershirts produced another quick consensus. This issue is settle by body type. The man with a good "bottom" and tight belly should wear jockeys. The well-muscled-shoulder man should wear sleeveless. Everyone else shouldn't. Pictures and slogans should be left to little boys under the age of 12.

WHAT MEN HATE ABOUT WHAT WOMEN WEAR
Clothes

Is this list a little out of balance?
Wayne Kelly

Alecia on Motivational Monday

ALECIA HUCK was my guest on the Wayne and Jayne show today. Over the past 10 years she has personally developed and delivered programs to approximately 2,500 participants with audiences ranging from 5-500 and an average size of approximately 20 participants. She has also held over 1300 formal, individual coaching sessions.

Her career began, quite literally, in the school of hard knocks. She spent 5 summers as a door-to-door salesman and manager during college. Although she was a top sales person and manager, it was in coaching and training that her real talents and passion revealed themselves. After time in the corporate world and working with another training company, she founded MAVERICK & COMPANY. Now she is a highly talented speaker, facilitator, coach and consultant. Her first book, a step-by-step marketing guide for service providers and small business owners, will be out this year.

Checkout her website at www.MaverickandCompany.com
Wayne Kelly

Popcorn Kills???

I was pretty nervous when I Heard the stories about aguy getting lung disease from the fumes of microwave popcorn. Well, even the Denver doctors who treated
the man say the guy "really liked microwave popcorn." He made two or
three bags every day for 10 years. And he "liked the smell of popcorn,
so he would open and inhale from freshly popped bags." Yikes...I like it but I don't like it that much.

Wayne Kelly